Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
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