Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
