I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
