You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
