OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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