I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
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