Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Randomize
