normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
