You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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