She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
