We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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