I'm gonna have a badass scar
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
