At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
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