He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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