Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
