eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
