I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
