He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize