I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Randomize