So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I want to make a zoo with you.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize