shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
