Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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