Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I am mentally ready for anal.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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