so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
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