My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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