I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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