I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
The cops high fived after they tackled you
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
