we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
pop tarts are not kleenex
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
