we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
