I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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