i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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