No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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