In the future we'll all be gay
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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