I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
