the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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