how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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