pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
