Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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