Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
