My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
