he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
