smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
