Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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