My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
they're like a gay fantastic four
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
You pole danced in your parka.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
