Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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