I think my fart just growled at me.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Who died my cat blue again?
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Randomize
