p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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