just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
