oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
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