I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
