Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
