I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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