i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
